Hi families,
Welcome to Term Three!
This term we will be looking at all the things we need to do to build resilience in our children.
Todays article demonstrated how two simple words can make all the difference.
Happy reading,
Ms Jodie
Building RESILIENCE in children using two words!
by Michael Grose
Recently, Jess, a mother, gave Billy, her school-aged son, a simple yet profound resilience lesson. Billy missed an excursion because of his poor school behaviour.
Addressing his protests about teacher unfairness, Billy’s mum responded calmly, “Oh well!”
Then she busied herself getting dinner ready.
Sideswiped by his mother’s apparent nonchalance, Billy shrugged and finished his homework.
Our responses to kids’ challenges are crucial.
Your response to kids’ everyday mistakes, mess-ups, and hurts are the real lessons in resilience.
The lessons for Billy were simple but profound. “Oh well” meant:
- Stuff happens.
- Don’t look for fault or blame.
- Keep your perspective.
- Pick yourself off and continue with what you were doing.
It’s how you say it that counts.
When a minor mishap with a child or teenager occurs:
- Match your response to the incident.
- Stay calm and be positive.
- Use strong body language to show certainty and inspire confidence.
- Remember, stuff happens.
“Oh, well” situations happen every day.
Every day, you will have many opportunities to develop children’s resilience.
Recognise any of these situations?
- A child is disappointed after not being selected for a team he really wanted to join. “Oh well, let’s see how you do next time.”
- When a boy experiences rejection in the playground at school. “Oh well. Not everyone wants to be your friend.”
- When a teenage girl doesn’t get the mark in an assignment, she thinks she should. “Oh well. Sometimes we don’t always get what we think.”
Some hardships need more than “Oh well.”
There are times when ‘Oh well’ won’t cut it.
- A child who is bullied needs your continued support.
- When a student’s continuous efforts are constantly met with criticism, you may need to act on his behalf and meet with a coach.
- When a child struggles to make the grade and is never picked for a team, you may need to help him make different choices.
These tougher situations also present opportunities for daily lessons in resilience, but they require more parental support and teaching.
The resilience lessons are deeper, including:
“Things will eventually go your way.”
“There are times when you need to seek help.”
“This too shall pass.”
Building resilience is not a one-off event.
Promote your child’s personal resilience by helping them cope with life’s hurts, disappointments and challenges in the present while building strengths for the future.
When your child experiences challenges, your reactions matter, so be ready to make the most of these valuable daily resilience lessons.
